Oh my goodness I am momming so hard right now. This is my seven-year-old son, Riley. He is absolutely beautiful. Although I do foresee waxing in his future. I mean, seriously? Those eyebrows are a-maz-ing!
His eye lashes are about a mile long and, as you can see, he has gorgeous hazel eyes, but be careful. It’s like looking into the eyes of Kaa. You fall under his spell and he’s got you.
However, trust me when I tell you, when you’re pissed off at him he really isn’t all that cute, but that is a story for another time.
Last night he came to me holding a paper bag he had decorated and told me it was a present for me.
Me: Riley that is so nice. Is it something you made at school?
Riley: Yes. Open it up now. You see inside? It’s wrapped up in that green paper. Unwrap it.
So, as I was told (Riley is very bossy and likes to take over and direct), I open it up and inside is a special ornament that he made. But, it’s not just any kid-made ornament. This ornament was made by MY kid (slightly biased) which makes it super duper special. Riley is watching me intently and I see there is a ribbon inside the ornament. Riley explained to me that the ribbon was as tall as he is right now. Okay, now we’ve moved into the “most exceptional ornament” category. What an amazing gift! In ten years, we can open it up and see how big he was right now.
Me: Riley, I absolutely love it. In fact, it’s the best gift I’ll get all Christmas.
Riley: Better than the stuff daddy gives you? (EVERYTHING is a contest with this kid)
Me: Waaaaaay better because YOU made it and I will keep it forever and each year we get to hang it on the tree.
He seemed quite satisfied with his efforts. So, I reminded him that Santa was watching.
Riley: Yeah, I know, I’m on the naughty list.
Me: Tonight I think you are on the sweetest-boy-ever list.
Riley: Well, maybe I’m somewhere in the middle of the list, you know, half-naughty and half-nice.
I’m not sure if he was trying to convince me, himself, or Santa but this made me laugh hysterically so Riley, prepared to seize the opportunity, looked me in the eye, batted those lashes and said: “So maybe sometime BEFORE Christmas you could wrap a present for me and let me open it. Like I did for you.” Ah, I see where this is headed. Time to crush his plan like a tin can.
Me: “Maybe not, but nice try.” (I am immune to his gaze.)
Gave myself a high-five and a pat on the back for staying strong. Way to go self! I think I may be half-naughty and half-nice too. I must have passed it on genetically. I knew it would turn out to be all my fault.